Why I Hate Lost (Even Now That It’s Done)
I don’t like Lost.
I know I’m not alone in this, but I feel like I’ve had a weird experience with the show. You see, when the show first started, I tried watching it, but like the passengers of the plane, I felt lost every episode. It wasn’t newbie friendly and I didn’t have Tivo, so I ignored the series. But people around my liked it, so I had to deal with listening to them talking about the show like it was God’s gift to television. This was before college and it was rough, but I made it through. I would see an episode on TV but I would skip it or, if I was with those watching it, I would ignore it.
Then, I entered college. This would be around the fourth and fifth season, so the show was losing people who came over to my side of the fence; people who felt like the show was going nowhere. But, most people in my dorm loved the show. Which meant I had to deal with more episodes playing then I had ever seen. Come the end of the show, roommates were crowding the common rooms as the watched breathlessly the show I had to keep shutting out with music or a book.
You would think, once the show ended, that I would be free it’s presence. No such luck, as of writing this, my wife is starting the sixth season on Netflix. Which means, two to three years after the show ended, I’m stuck having to see more episodes on my television.
In a way, having watched the series out of order and randomly, I feel like my experience with the island is very much like the characters on the show.
But I can’t stand the series. Sometimes, I feel like I’m taking crazy pills when people talk about how good the show is. All I can see is unlikable, obnoxious character who do whatever the writers need done, not what they would do. Mysteries that don’t get answered, plots that get covered in more plots to the point of having to measure time by the layer of soil on each thread and I can’t for the life of me understand why watching a bunch of people walk around on an island doing nothing is entertaining. Every episode I see moves at a snail’s pace and ends on a cliffhanger that will not have a satisfying resolution come next week. Sure, in the first season, I thought the Myst/Riven like atmosphere of the show was intriguing, but talk about throwing away all the goodwill you built.
Maybe it’s because it was genre television for those who didn’t normally watch genre television, but not as good as Game of Thrones. Lost is science fiction lite or something, that if a book, would be sold in airports. It always seems to be so obsessed with itself, so self-assure and pretentious about how clever it’s being, just because it does everything it can think of. It’s like a cook thinking they’re the greatest chef in the world because they filled a pot with everything they could find in the fridge; sure, it’s stew but it’s not very good and I can’t understand why people like it.
I’m just worried that when my wife finishes the series, two years later I’m going to make friends with people who haven’t ever watched the show and are just starting it from the beginning. And then, my kids will want to watch it. Then, when I’m old and put away in a retirement home, some of my fellow elders will want to rewatch their favorite show from their youth and I’ll know they mean Lost.
And then I’ll die.
Or, you know, have a weird metaphysical experience on an island filled with never to work again actors.